For several years in a row I would take a social media break during Lent. I would use the Lenten season as an excuse to give myself permission to take a hiatus from the doom scrolling and the death by a thousand cuts of comparing my life and story to that of those I saw online. Comparison really is the thief of joy.

This year, I decided that I am going to get a jump on Lent and start my social media vacation now. Not out of some misplaced duty, but for myself. As a way to honor the commitment I have made to myself in 2026. To really dig into who I am, and, more importantly, who I want to be.

Before I signed out of all the apps (why are there SOOO many?!) I came across a quote on Threads that was posted by @coachvalj. It read:

“You are not discovering who you are. You are engineering who you become.”

I thought that was extraordinarily profound. Never in my life have I considered that I might have a say in who I was. I have spent so much of my life defining myself by the relationships I was in and the roles I played – daughter, mother, wife, girlfriend, lover, student, employee, etc. The very idea that I could choose how I engaged in each of those roles was not something I thought possible. I have always needed to be who someone else wanted me to be. I learned early that it was the safest course of action.

I entered 2026 with so much hope, so much excitement to figure out who I was. I wasn’t tied to anyone’s idea of who I was. I wasn’t bound by the confines of anyone else’s opinion. And that was terrifying. So, I started searching on social media for someone to attach my identity to all while playing hard to get, because, after all, 2026 is about me, no men. No sex. Just Shannon and a mirror.

So here I am. My social media apps have been deleted. I have a new lease on life. The world is my oyster. I get to explore who I want to be. What parts of my personality are genuinely me, and what parts have been manufactured to fit in? What parts are a defense mechanism or a trauma response? I can’t wait to find out.